I am a failure. And I hate myself for it. I need to get serious about this diet. I hate bingeing. I hate the stress in my life and I wish things were better.
I am having a really hard time right now. I just hate my life and I want to die. My job is kicking my ass and my husband is a selfish abusive jerk.
tired tired tired
I’m tired. Really tired. I worked out today and I ate 30 pretzel sticks. Then I passed out, so I ate 30 more. I’m still really tired. Eating some more will help me wake up but it will also make me feel gross. So… what’s worse, being really really really tired and needing to get things done or being really really really fat and feeling sad and not doing anything.
200 Calories; You Choose →
fat people eating
So no more cheezits for me. Fuck. I really liked them. My mother, 400 pounds, is sitting in front of me eating a bowl of cheezits. Now I want to vomit and I associate eating cheezits with being fat. Four years ago I saw a 450 pound woman drinking a diet pepsi. Haven’t touched Pepsi since.
Ok so it’s August. Wow summer is gone by fast. I cannot fit into my winter clothes so August will be devoted to making this happen. I want to be 110 pounds a.s.a.p. I am 138 today. I want to make 120 by September 1 so I can be all beautiful and ready for my birthday on the 15th. No one around me supports my goals to be glamorously skinny; I don’t care. I want to be comfortable in my...